Things Mexicans Like #5 – Honking their horns (tocando sus bocinas)

Mexicans are very aggressive drivers, and honestly, they have to be. There are no rules of the road – merely suggestions. Stop doesn’t mean stop; it means continue rolling until you’re sure (or maybe not so sure) that you can make the intersection and then floor it. Lanes? What lanes? Slower vehicles straddle the shoulder while taxis, autobuses, and privately owned vehicles weave around each other in the remaining space. Also, no one uses seatbelts (cinturones de seguro). Nothing about driving (or riding) here is safe. But the point is, people don’t hesitate to honk their horns – even when there’s not much to honk about. And once one person honks, everyone wants a turn. I can’t even remember the last time I used my horn at home, even when I am being run off the road. I generally just stare in agony at my impending accident and scream obscenities until the other driver realizes what a dumbass they are.

If you don’t know yet, my “Things Mexicans Like…” trend is inspired by a site called Stuff White People Like. They randomly post new “stuff” but since the “Stuff White People Like” book was just released in May, many of the recent posts have been about that. I seriously wet my pants over this shit because it hits so close to home for me… standing still at concerts, recycling, being vegetarian, loving Asians, Wes Anderson flicks, and Obama… It’s great. If you’re white and these stereotypes don’t apply to you, then you should probably check out your gene pool… or just laugh because you can at least think of 50 white people off the top of your head that do wear New Balance or think they know what’s best for poor people. If you’ve never had a chance to check it out you should, especially since you found out about it from a white person who is Studying Abroad (#72).

Things I Won’t Miss #2 – the neighborhood dogs (los perros del barrio)
I haven’t been able to sleep well at night lately – partially because the dogs in this town NEVER SLEEP. It’s sort of like the honking of the horns thing. Once one dog opens his damn mouth, they all have an opinion, and they voice their opinions, LOUDLY, until a las dos o tres en la manana (2 or 3 in the morning). I’ve gotten so restless listening to them at night that I create dialogue in my head. Last night it went a little something like this:

-Political Dog – “So who do you guys think Obama and McCain are going to choose for running mates?”
And because all Mexican dogs care deeply about American politics…
-1,000 other dogs in the general vicinity of my house – “RABBLE RABBLE RABBLE….”
This goes on for thirty minutes. Until one voice of wisdom emerges…
-Sensible Dog – “You know, the media is only making a big deal out that and every other detail of the election to take your minds off the damage that the Bush administration is still causing.”
1,000 dogs realize that Sensible Dog is correct, and the night falls silent for about 15 minutes, until…
-Music Snob Dog – “In Rainbows is totally the best album since the Bends.”
And because all Mexican dogs have an infinite knowledge of Radiohead…
-1,000 other dogs – “RABBLE RABBLE RABBLE RABBLE”
Once again, this occurs for approximately half an hour, until diehard Kid A and OK Computer fans get sick of arguing. Finally, the night is calm, until…
-Stupid Fucking Dog – “So, the new Terminator movie is going to kick ass.”
Silence.
Because even Mexican dogs know that casting Christian Bale won’t save the concept of another Terminator flick from sucking big time.

In the past couple of days I’ve visited three art museums (graphic, contemporary, and Oaxacan painters), a etnobotanical garden, the city cemetery (WAY cool and creepy – check out the facebook pics), the ginormous, sprawling Sunday market at Tlacolula, a shanty town called Yagul (I thought I was going to the Zapotec ruins, but the bus driver left me next to a village of wooden shacks in the middle of NOWHERE), and Santa Maria del Tule. Tule is byfar one of the coolest things ever. It’s a tree which is over 2000 years old (possibly the oldest living thing on the planet), with a height of over 130 feet and a circumference of approximately 178 feet. I’m a tree hugger, but to surround this tree (possibly the world's largest biomass) in total, I would need about 34 other people to help! It’s really a beautiful thing. And the tour guides… are local kids! They are really cute! The town of Santa Maria del Tule is adorable and I wanted to stay there all day, but I had to get back to conversation class by 4. On the ride back I tried to take in all of the sights and smells the entire time. I know I’ve been doing the “things I won’t miss section,” but since I only have ten days left, here’s one thing I definitely will miss when I return to the States: The Sierra Norte Montañas. The mountains are absolutely marvelous – literally breathtaking- and I don’t know what I’ll do when I wake up and look out the window only to find the Cumberland Plateau. Today was the first day I cried not because I miss home (I’ve done that enough), but rather because I will miss Mexico.